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Thursday, February 26, 2009

LISTENING 2 CHILDREN: The Art of Love

The ART of LOVE

February is the month of LOVE. Valentine’s Day offers a wonderful opportunity to stop and look more closely at this ageless subject. Sometimes, the re-examining of a word or topic can pierce the armor we may have placed around the subject and a new way of looking at the topic results. Or sometimes, when we encounter another and are shown great love and consideration, we stop and reshape our way of living life. With such newness, a rich vitality can be rekindled. And what can be more exciting than living life with vitality!

Webster’s Dictionary gave the following definition about LOVE.
“A feeling of warm personal attachment or deep affection.”

Affection used in the definition of love can be described as kindness, caring, fondness and goodwill.

I think it’s safe to say that all of us want our children and/or the children we know and love to be loving…to treat others with kindness, with care, with fondness and goodwill.

Can we have an active part in assuring that our children do grow up as LOVING individuals?
I believe that you… that all of us have a new opportunity everyday, in every moment and in every way to model either LOVE or non-LOVE! When you are involved with children, you have a wonderful opportunity to demonstrate LOVE.

Every Day in Every Moment
You
Model
LOVE or non-LOVE!

Children are watching you ALL the time! Even when they do not appear to be. The old saying is that “teachers have eyes in the back of their head”. Well, children have extraordinary perception in their eyes and ears!

Everything you say and do is very much heard. And I’ve even had children pick up on the things I think! So, what amazing opportunities to model LOVE!

Many years ago I was working in a Child Developmental Day Care Center. It was near the end of the day and we only had 4 children remaining. My co-teacher and I were observing the children and talking as they worked on an art project and talking amongst themselves. All of a sudden one of the 4-year-old girls looked up at us and said, “Why do you talk so nicely to each other?” Yes, every moment of every day you are being watched!

Whether you are talking to your co-teacher, your partner, a friend or your child, all conversations and interactions are an opportunity to spread the LOVE!

7 Ways of Modeling LOVE
• Use respectful language & a gentle tone in conversations.
• Invite cooperation, do not demand obedience.
• Create an environment of peacefulness and harmlessness in your home or classroom.
• Offer choices allowing for children’s individual preferences.
• Allow children to see peaceful disagreements occur and peaceful solutions reached.
• Consider your child’s development level when making requests.
• Create an age-appropriate home environment, allowing for your child/rens’ play and work.
In most situations, the way a child is treated is the way a child will respond. And even when a child is being inappropriate, an adults response to him/her, needs to be
polite and harmless. Anger should not breed anger!

Pam Leo suggests if you question whether or not your language is appropriate, ask yourself: “Would I speak in this manner to my best friend?” If not, then perhaps you want to re-think your languaging.

You never know when your happy smile, or your kind words or your caring actions are just the LOVE that is deeply needed by an individual in that moment!

Your LOVE is like the pebble being dropped into the pond, creating ripple after ripple.

Your LOVE likewise spreads person to person to person to person!

Sharon Ann Wikoff holds two California teaching credentials and is an EFT (Emotional Freedom Techniques) Practitioner. Sharon hosts the radio program, The VOICE of CHANGE. This month she hosts the teleclass: Creating Play Environments for Children. Details can be found on her website: www.AuthenticWays.com

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